Why the sudden change?

So in my first post I talked a lot about why I want and need to lose weight. But what really caught my attention and the reason I'm somehow really determined is because of one little girl. EMMA. My older sister just got married to a man who has a daughter. Her name is Emma. Now, Erin is a step-mom, but I don't really get the step-aunt title. I'm okay with that as long as I get to treat her like a niece. Lucky for me, Emma loves hanging out with me. So, when we went to the wedding her and I got to spend some time together. At the rehearsal dinner she really wanted to dance on the dance floor, but there was no music playing so her Grandma Jane told her she needed to sit down. I then got up and started dancing with her even though we had no music. After a little while she asked me a question that really kind of hurt me as  well as inspired me. She said, "Emily, why do you have two bellies?" Jane told her that it was rude of her to ask and insisted that she go sit down. She asked me again and I looked at her and said, " Well I like it like that. I wear my pants tight around the middle so that i get two bellies." Emma was satisfied with this response and returned to her seat as instructed. I was completely embarrassed. I couldn't believe that I pretended to like the fact that my midsection is so large. I  hated that she  could see it even though I was wearing a really baggy dress. I knew that her question was innocent, but I'm sure other people have thought the same thing only they have filters and would never mention my weight. That night I thought about that conversation time and time again. I always seem to make a joke out of my size or pretend like it never bothers me at all. I don't know if I actually do a good job at fooling the people around me, but I definitely never fooled myself. I hate that my graduation gown didn't fit in the right size so I had to get a larger one. I don't have to hate this stuff any more though. It can all be changed and I will make those changes.